Saturday, October 10, 2009
On that day.... it hurts...
I waited and you never came. You love to play the waiting game isn't it? Do you feel good making me wait? I still wait patiently till I am disappointed with myself. I know from the first start and I asked. Not once. Not twice. Many times. I gave you chances to tell me the truth. I want to hear the truth then. At the very least, I will not be hurt knowing that you sincerely wanna be my friend. An honest friend. Without lies. You know I hate liars. Why did you lead me on? Why? Is it your intention to hurt me? I just want to be happy. Is it wrong for me to do that?

Why must you tell me that she is here? Don't act as if nothing is wrong and want to continue talking to me. I told you that I understand cos I know from the start. I know that you lied. But still, I dunno why I am hurting this much. Why must things happen between us? Why must you assure me that you'll be there and this happen? You lied!

Five days. No messages. No calls. I did not wait. In fact, I was scared that you will call or message me and ask me questions. I do not know how to answer. Why am I feeling guilty when the mistake is yours? Why must you carry me up just to let me fall again? What wrong have I done to you that you must do this to me?!

On the sixth day, we have to meet not because of personal matters but professionally. I avoid your eyes and even yourself if I could. I got down the van and just walk without looking at you directly. I thought I was safe when we are infront of the registration counter as there is lots of nurses there but you popped the question. That question which I dunno how to answer. You asked why am I so cold towards you. Am I? How do you want me to react?

I sat further away from you to avoid another questions but 10mins later, you sat beside me and ask why am I so cold towards you again. I told you am fine and there is no cold act but you insist. You took the act that there is no messages and calls from me and you ask why.... I dunno how to answer that and so I questioned you back, you didn't call or msg me either right? And there and then you message me. Haha what a joke. You dun msg ppl wen they are right in front of you. DUH! And why when you make sum calls or receive incoming calls, you will walk away from me but when I receive calls or make sum calls, you ask me who? Who calls me? Who did I call? What I did the previous day? Who did I went out with? Who is this guy? Who is that guy? Who is the guy who message you? Take my mobile away and kept scrolling and play games on my mobile. Argh!

You're hurting me more. Don't you know that? I hate it my dear. Why did you do this to me? When I got out from the van, you asked me if I will call you or at least message you. I asked you, do I need to? and you asked why.... I was reluctant to answer at first but then I said.... in case you forgot my dear..... YOU LIED! and I heard you asked what? But I slammed the door on you and never turn back.

In case you fail to notice. In case you fail to see. This is my heart. Bleeding before you. This is me down on my knees!

Another you. Please. I beg you. Don't lead her. She is still young. To young to know. So, please....
posted by Titiks @ 11:24 AM |
About Me

Titiks, born on 1st July, gainfully employed in an architech firm. Sometimes happy, sometimes sad but hey, I'm only human!
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